Today it was my first day with Companhia Instavel. I barely slept yesterday. Not so much because I was stressed or anxious for today, but because they forgot or neglected to bring bed sheets and a duvet or a blanket in my room . Can you imagine how I was after 14 hours of traveling? I had to sleep with 3 shirts and 3 pair of trousers. Still I was cold and felt very unvomfortable and I had very little sleep.
In the morning, I met Vera Santos, the rehearsal director, and Antonio Julio the other choreographer of the company. We had a fast breakfast in a café and Vera explained to us the irregularities and difficulties of the program. The problem is that Companhia Instavel has not managed to find a single space where each choreographer can go there regularly. In fact we are going to be working at two different dance schools, and we might need to commute during the day from one dance school to another. Not only that, but we don’t know what times we can be in the studios. How much time ? How many hours per day can I rehearse? We can only know the program of studios ONLY 1-2 days before… and not only which studios we use but also how much time we can work per day. That sounds a bit difficult to organize a long term schedule.
On the other hand, I might just take advantage of this roughness and let me concentrate more on “come what may”. It might give me a hint to keep myself alert for any moments of unexpected gloriousness. The fluctuation on the program could maybe reflect a certain fluidity on the management of the creative outcome. Or differently said, what are the influences of this “unorganized” organization? How can identify these influences and be aware of them so as to use or abandon them according to my specific needs? In order to do that, I need to describe and thus identify what I mean by “unorganized” or how is this organization different from what I have been used until now to work. For tomorrow, thus, I should be alert in analyzing the major traits of this way of work organization. If possible I should try to find similarities and differences with previous works I’ve done and try to see the performative elements of these differences to influence the artistic outcome.
Meeting in the Studio
I saw again Marta, Robert and Goncalo, the three performers we are working together.
We soon discovered that all three of them had studied in The Netherlands. Is that a coincidence? We sat around a big table. I congratulated them for having made it in the auditions and explained them that they were picked out because of their ability to adapt to the different tasks of the three choreographers (the audition was given by 3 different choreographers and all three of us we had to decided which dancers to choose). The reason I did this was because I wanted to call their attention in adaptability and how different (or maybe not) my choreographic method will be in comparison to that of Marianne (the previous choreographer). I also asked how they worked with Marianne in order to have a clearer view of what they are used to do. In that sense I could be more aware about their experience in methodologies and strategies and take advantage of their knowledge and custom or spend more time in explaining things they have not encountered before.
The shadow lights from the windows in the studio
We then explained the general outline of the way I am thinking of working. The first week mainly will be lecturing, talking, discussing, writing, speaking, jotting down, drawing, watching and in 6 words: ACCUMULATING KNOWLEDGE. I want us all to be at the same level of understanding, so that we all speak the same language of what I am looking for in the work. I don’t think that in the end of this week, we all think of the same outcome or in the same way, but at least the sky will be clearer, Marta, Goncalo and Robert able to understand more things, and I will feel more comfortable in leading research towards complex concepts. Sometimes, it feels like a lecturer, but my intention is to try more than that, to simulate a small think-tank group. Where there is a person that introduces an idea, topic and then the whole group has the possibility to discuss together and come to some development of these ideas.
I therefore, explained them more precise the two pillars of the work.
1. Why we like watching violence; and
2. Camp aesthetics, Masquerade, Aestetics of Failure.
I tried to define what I mean with these above terms. Not so much in order to establish that this is right or wrong but with the idea of building out a common understanding, a common denominator where we can set out for a journey. Here is my notes:
BLOGGING (again????)
A good way, I have thought until now is to ask from all four of us to have a blog. I have previously worked on blogging and discovered its tiring but beneficial aspects (you can check out at http://painofothers.blogspot.com). The rules/ideas/guidelines that I have set out for blogging are reflecting ideas from Camp and Appeal of Violence. Here they are (I hope it’s clear how they do so):
Blog about
1. Obersvation Reflection Discussion Evaluation Recommendation (ORDER)
2. Automatic writing
3. Allow your thought to develop while writing or allow your writing to take you into paths you hadn’t thought before
4. Your own difficulties, discoveries, reflections
5. Don’t be critical for the sake of being critical
6. Situate everything in/about/concerning yourself, nothing about the other person’s difficulties, weaknesses. What did you get?
7. Keep it interesting, find ways to make it interesting to be read
8. Show your inspirations by other people (choreographer, dancers, books, artists etc)
9. How do you process the feedback given
10. Explain the/ your methodology? What is the/your strategy?
11. Why did you get interested, bored, angry, sad, excited? What does that say about you?
12. How does writing influence your participation?
13. Where do you find inspiration? What are your references? Can you be transparent or you prefer to hide it? Why did I do like that? Who/what influenced me?
14. Is writing enough to help you find your way for tomorrow? What did you decide? How do you need to work ? What did you learn from today or how do you want to approach your work differently tomorrow in order to solve any problems?
15. What is the limit of writing? What do I write and what not? Can I write everything? If yes, how do I write everything? If not why not? If yes is that enough? If not, why not more? Is enough really enough? Can you do more than enough? Can you force yourself? What happens other than being angry, tired or bored? Can you discover creativity through excess ?
16. What happened today? What experiments/games/exercises did we do? What did I do? What was my commitment into it?
17. How did I feel? Why did I feel like that?
18. How can I correct myself tomorrow? What is that I need to take with me tomorrow?
19. Am I defensive while writing ? Why then write this blog down? Why expose myself and be defensive? Isn’t it that by writing I allow myself to be vulnerable? Am I strong enough to be vulnerable? Do I have the guts to feel secure as to allow transparency? Why does that affect me? Can I expose myself without judgment or emotion ?
20. Why is a rainbow more interesting to watch/talk about than a bin full of garbage? How can I just see the garbage but concentrate on the rainbow? Do I need the rainbow? What if I don’t only see the garbage but remember that it was me who threw the litter in there?
21. Can I be glorious, spectacular and intimate while writing?
22. Who am I when I am writing? Is it me or is it me watching me? Or is it someone watching me? Or is it me watching someone else being me?
23. Can I be generous, grateful and munificent? Why is it difficult being generous, grateful and munificent?
24. Why being simply critical is not enough? What is more than being critical? Who is more and why ? Can I be more? Why do we write this blog?
25. Why do I write this blog? Where do I focus: on the negatives or the positives? Why ? What is easier to do good, focusing on the negatives or discovering what the positive elements are/could be?
My main preoccupation with blogging is the fact that it is a very heavy burden that even I found moments where I hated it, helpful though it might be. My question then is How do I keep the passion in me burning? How do I keep myself a devoted writer ? How is writing more important for me than anything else? And ofcourse how can I make Robert, Goncalo, Marta feel the same for their own blogs? And this idea about passion, seriousness about your passion, derives from camp aesthetics. One thing I know for sure. We need internet at the studenthouse FOR SURE. So that at least they can do it when they feel relaxed.
Youtube as a source for inspiration
After that we had a break. When we came back, we saw some videos on Youtube featuring Camp. I began by showing an extract from ‘Another Gay Movie’ where one of the characters is performing what we traditionally call “Camp”. In that sense, it is a representation of Camp, but I found it quite useful to give the stereotype of Camp.
After that, we watched the Greek Reality show “Paratragouda” by Anita Pania, where she invites old men and women to show themselves on her program and then people can call them and have dates with them. What Anita Pania does is to ask these people to sing or perform in a theatrical play. None of them trained as an actor/singer, they sing their outmost and try to be as good as possible or maybe feel good. It is not to be to say how they feel or what they do. I just want to give a description (sorry if I offend someone). Below is a guy singing the song “To thelo” (I want it).
After that an old woman who has only one tooth and she sings “Exo ap’ ta dontia” (Literally meaning “out of the teeth”, in greek means outspeak, not be afraid to say the truth). I perceived them both as being camp, because of their passion and seriousness in their personification, their naivity, the exaggeration that comes out of the repetition of what they think a singer should do, and the inherent failure in that effort. In that sense, I agree with Sontag when she says that “camp is a lie that tells the truth”, because yes it’s obvious they are lying that they are singers, everyone can see that. BUT, I can see so many other things in these generous people, because they expose their hearts and feelings. Camp is a love for the human nature…
Camp is not always funny (if it is ever funny). It is not something you laugh at, but something you can enjoy. Usually however, people perceive camp behavior as quite disturbing. Maybe because of what Kristeva calls abjection. We abject what we think that jeopardizes our own existence. Without wanting to go into detail on what abjection is, I showed this following video to the guys, of a woman bodybuilder.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c68_kwdQWzs&feature=related
And also of this super masculine male model, lip syncing on female voice.
And that entered us in the world of lip syncing. The first and foremost video I wanted to show was the NUMA NUMA guy
This boy had created this video, years before Youtube existed. Some of his friends passed it around and soon this guy became internationally famous. He then became depressed for he felt people made fun of him, and it took him an awful lot of time to recover. After that he tried to make another film, but its success was not as big as the first one.
A great duet of lipsyncing is these two Korean friends singing at the tune of a Backstreet Boys song. Why is this camp ? or why do I include it in my footage? It’s because of the passion that these guyz have. Although exaggerated, I never have the feeling that they are not believing what they do. They are very strong performers. And for me that happens because of passion. Enjoy…
In the morning, I met Vera Santos, the rehearsal director, and Antonio Julio the other choreographer of the company. We had a fast breakfast in a café and Vera explained to us the irregularities and difficulties of the program. The problem is that Companhia Instavel has not managed to find a single space where each choreographer can go there regularly. In fact we are going to be working at two different dance schools, and we might need to commute during the day from one dance school to another. Not only that, but we don’t know what times we can be in the studios. How much time ? How many hours per day can I rehearse? We can only know the program of studios ONLY 1-2 days before… and not only which studios we use but also how much time we can work per day. That sounds a bit difficult to organize a long term schedule.
On the other hand, I might just take advantage of this roughness and let me concentrate more on “come what may”. It might give me a hint to keep myself alert for any moments of unexpected gloriousness. The fluctuation on the program could maybe reflect a certain fluidity on the management of the creative outcome. Or differently said, what are the influences of this “unorganized” organization? How can identify these influences and be aware of them so as to use or abandon them according to my specific needs? In order to do that, I need to describe and thus identify what I mean by “unorganized” or how is this organization different from what I have been used until now to work. For tomorrow, thus, I should be alert in analyzing the major traits of this way of work organization. If possible I should try to find similarities and differences with previous works I’ve done and try to see the performative elements of these differences to influence the artistic outcome.
Meeting in the Studio
I saw again Marta, Robert and Goncalo, the three performers we are working together.
We soon discovered that all three of them had studied in The Netherlands. Is that a coincidence? We sat around a big table. I congratulated them for having made it in the auditions and explained them that they were picked out because of their ability to adapt to the different tasks of the three choreographers (the audition was given by 3 different choreographers and all three of us we had to decided which dancers to choose). The reason I did this was because I wanted to call their attention in adaptability and how different (or maybe not) my choreographic method will be in comparison to that of Marianne (the previous choreographer). I also asked how they worked with Marianne in order to have a clearer view of what they are used to do. In that sense I could be more aware about their experience in methodologies and strategies and take advantage of their knowledge and custom or spend more time in explaining things they have not encountered before.
The shadow lights from the windows in the studioWe then explained the general outline of the way I am thinking of working. The first week mainly will be lecturing, talking, discussing, writing, speaking, jotting down, drawing, watching and in 6 words: ACCUMULATING KNOWLEDGE. I want us all to be at the same level of understanding, so that we all speak the same language of what I am looking for in the work. I don’t think that in the end of this week, we all think of the same outcome or in the same way, but at least the sky will be clearer, Marta, Goncalo and Robert able to understand more things, and I will feel more comfortable in leading research towards complex concepts. Sometimes, it feels like a lecturer, but my intention is to try more than that, to simulate a small think-tank group. Where there is a person that introduces an idea, topic and then the whole group has the possibility to discuss together and come to some development of these ideas.
I therefore, explained them more precise the two pillars of the work.
1. Why we like watching violence; and
2. Camp aesthetics, Masquerade, Aestetics of Failure.
I tried to define what I mean with these above terms. Not so much in order to establish that this is right or wrong but with the idea of building out a common understanding, a common denominator where we can set out for a journey. Here is my notes:
BLOGGING (again????)
A good way, I have thought until now is to ask from all four of us to have a blog. I have previously worked on blogging and discovered its tiring but beneficial aspects (you can check out at http://painofothers.blogspot.com). The rules/ideas/guidelines that I have set out for blogging are reflecting ideas from Camp and Appeal of Violence. Here they are (I hope it’s clear how they do so):
Blog about
1. Obersvation Reflection Discussion Evaluation Recommendation (ORDER)
2. Automatic writing
3. Allow your thought to develop while writing or allow your writing to take you into paths you hadn’t thought before
4. Your own difficulties, discoveries, reflections
5. Don’t be critical for the sake of being critical
6. Situate everything in/about/concerning yourself, nothing about the other person’s difficulties, weaknesses. What did you get?
7. Keep it interesting, find ways to make it interesting to be read
8. Show your inspirations by other people (choreographer, dancers, books, artists etc)
9. How do you process the feedback given
10. Explain the/ your methodology? What is the/your strategy?
11. Why did you get interested, bored, angry, sad, excited? What does that say about you?
12. How does writing influence your participation?
13. Where do you find inspiration? What are your references? Can you be transparent or you prefer to hide it? Why did I do like that? Who/what influenced me?
14. Is writing enough to help you find your way for tomorrow? What did you decide? How do you need to work ? What did you learn from today or how do you want to approach your work differently tomorrow in order to solve any problems?
15. What is the limit of writing? What do I write and what not? Can I write everything? If yes, how do I write everything? If not why not? If yes is that enough? If not, why not more? Is enough really enough? Can you do more than enough? Can you force yourself? What happens other than being angry, tired or bored? Can you discover creativity through excess ?
16. What happened today? What experiments/games/exercises did we do? What did I do? What was my commitment into it?
17. How did I feel? Why did I feel like that?
18. How can I correct myself tomorrow? What is that I need to take with me tomorrow?
19. Am I defensive while writing ? Why then write this blog down? Why expose myself and be defensive? Isn’t it that by writing I allow myself to be vulnerable? Am I strong enough to be vulnerable? Do I have the guts to feel secure as to allow transparency? Why does that affect me? Can I expose myself without judgment or emotion ?
20. Why is a rainbow more interesting to watch/talk about than a bin full of garbage? How can I just see the garbage but concentrate on the rainbow? Do I need the rainbow? What if I don’t only see the garbage but remember that it was me who threw the litter in there?
21. Can I be glorious, spectacular and intimate while writing?
22. Who am I when I am writing? Is it me or is it me watching me? Or is it someone watching me? Or is it me watching someone else being me?
23. Can I be generous, grateful and munificent? Why is it difficult being generous, grateful and munificent?
24. Why being simply critical is not enough? What is more than being critical? Who is more and why ? Can I be more? Why do we write this blog?
25. Why do I write this blog? Where do I focus: on the negatives or the positives? Why ? What is easier to do good, focusing on the negatives or discovering what the positive elements are/could be?
My main preoccupation with blogging is the fact that it is a very heavy burden that even I found moments where I hated it, helpful though it might be. My question then is How do I keep the passion in me burning? How do I keep myself a devoted writer ? How is writing more important for me than anything else? And ofcourse how can I make Robert, Goncalo, Marta feel the same for their own blogs? And this idea about passion, seriousness about your passion, derives from camp aesthetics. One thing I know for sure. We need internet at the studenthouse FOR SURE. So that at least they can do it when they feel relaxed.
Youtube as a source for inspiration
After that we had a break. When we came back, we saw some videos on Youtube featuring Camp. I began by showing an extract from ‘Another Gay Movie’ where one of the characters is performing what we traditionally call “Camp”. In that sense, it is a representation of Camp, but I found it quite useful to give the stereotype of Camp.
After that, we watched the Greek Reality show “Paratragouda” by Anita Pania, where she invites old men and women to show themselves on her program and then people can call them and have dates with them. What Anita Pania does is to ask these people to sing or perform in a theatrical play. None of them trained as an actor/singer, they sing their outmost and try to be as good as possible or maybe feel good. It is not to be to say how they feel or what they do. I just want to give a description (sorry if I offend someone). Below is a guy singing the song “To thelo” (I want it).
After that an old woman who has only one tooth and she sings “Exo ap’ ta dontia” (Literally meaning “out of the teeth”, in greek means outspeak, not be afraid to say the truth). I perceived them both as being camp, because of their passion and seriousness in their personification, their naivity, the exaggeration that comes out of the repetition of what they think a singer should do, and the inherent failure in that effort. In that sense, I agree with Sontag when she says that “camp is a lie that tells the truth”, because yes it’s obvious they are lying that they are singers, everyone can see that. BUT, I can see so many other things in these generous people, because they expose their hearts and feelings. Camp is a love for the human nature…
Camp is not always funny (if it is ever funny). It is not something you laugh at, but something you can enjoy. Usually however, people perceive camp behavior as quite disturbing. Maybe because of what Kristeva calls abjection. We abject what we think that jeopardizes our own existence. Without wanting to go into detail on what abjection is, I showed this following video to the guys, of a woman bodybuilder.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c68_kwdQWzs&feature=related
And also of this super masculine male model, lip syncing on female voice.
And that entered us in the world of lip syncing. The first and foremost video I wanted to show was the NUMA NUMA guy
This boy had created this video, years before Youtube existed. Some of his friends passed it around and soon this guy became internationally famous. He then became depressed for he felt people made fun of him, and it took him an awful lot of time to recover. After that he tried to make another film, but its success was not as big as the first one.
A great duet of lipsyncing is these two Korean friends singing at the tune of a Backstreet Boys song. Why is this camp ? or why do I include it in my footage? It’s because of the passion that these guyz have. Although exaggerated, I never have the feeling that they are not believing what they do. They are very strong performers. And for me that happens because of passion. Enjoy…
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